Wedding Planning Burnout

Couples Corner

You have been in full wedding planning mode for a few months now and all of a sudden that burst of excitement is now starting to turn to feelings of annoyance and dread.

What was once a “I am so excited to go visit this vendor and see what they can offer” now sounds like “ugh I don’t have time to go visit this vendor and don’t understand why I have to do this right now.”

Sound familiar?

Well if you are experiencing a mix of emotions throughout your wedding planning process, chances are you may be feeling some wedding planning burnout!


So what exactly is wedding planning burnout?

Here are some common experiences:

  • Sense of failure or self-doubt about the wedding and maybe even yourself or relationship.
  • Feeling helpless, trapped, defeated.
  • Loss of motivation.
  • Cynical and/or negative outlook about your wedding.
  • Decreased satisfaction and sense of accomplishment.
  • Feeling drained or tired.
  • Lowered immunity, frequently getting sick.
  • Frequent headaches and muscle pain.
  • Change in appetite and/or sleep habits.

Some common thoughts from people who are experiencing burnout include:

“I don’t even remember how I got here.”
“I just want to feel happy and light again”
“I don’t feel like myself”
“I thought this was going to be different.”
“I don’t know what happened.”

These are common burnout symptoms and thoughts that one should be mindful of experiencing as it can sometimes feel like a weird out of body experience that is unfamiliar to you. This often occurs due to constant stress or worry occurring.


Here are some ways to deal with burnout:

Lean on your support system

Know you are not alone. Talk with someone you trust such as your fiancé, friends, or family.
Let them know that you are needing help with planning your wedding or maybe taking something else off of your plate.


Take a break from wedding planning

Maybe that is focusing on the holidays for the time being or your upcoming birthday. This can even mean unfollowing some wedding vendors and silencing some notifications for a few weeks or months.


Develop boundaries about talking about your wedding

Naturally people are curious and excited for your upcoming wedding, but this can quickly get annoying if you are experiencing burnout. You can find ways to end a conversation quickly about your wedding with friends and family.

Some examples are:

  • “It’s been really busy coordinating everything, I would prefer not to talk about it, but how have you been doing?”
    • Note that here you are being honest with the experience, but turning the attention back to someone.
  • “It’s been really busy and actually, I would love to see if I can talk to you sometime next week about getting some help with the planning.”
    • If someone is interested in your big day and you feel you are drowning or unmotivated, take this as an opportunity to ask for help.


Talk to a mental health therapist

Not only will you learn coping skills to deal with the current burnout, but will also learn coping skills to help prevent burnout in the future.
This can be done individually or together with your fiancé.


Prioritize your health

Focusing in on your physical, emotional, mental, and relational health are so important! Find ways to keep up with your basic needs of moving your body and drinking enough water. Remember to practice gratitude and express your feelings to people who are close to you.

Wedding planning burnout is a real thing! Know you are not alone and that there is a way to cope with burnout .
If you are needing help with wedding planning burnout, you can contact an online therapist  at Modern Wellness Counseling  and a trained licensed mental health professional can help you right away!


By Priscilla Rodriguez, M.S., LMFT , Owner of Modern Wellness Counseling

Priscilla specializes in working with engaged couples and helps them learn the strategic tools  needed so that they can be on the same page throughout every chapter of their lives. Be sure to check out the online premarital courses and do not forget to download the Free Conversation Checklist for Engaged Couples.

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