Wedding planning can be a stressful and emotional time, and it’s not uncommon for conflicts to arise between family members, bridesmaids, or even the bride and groom. 

If you’re facing drama in your wedding planning process, here are some tips that can help you handle it:

Take a step back

Before you respond to any conflict, take a moment to ground yourself and assess the situation objectively. This can help you approach the problem with a clear mind and a solution-focused mindset.

Perhaps asking yourself the following questions can be helpful:

• What am I most frustrated about at this moment? Is it not being heard or validated?
• What is one thing I am trying to communicate at this moment?
• How is my breathing right now?
  • Taking time to take a few deep breaths can help you feel grounded faster!

Communicate openly and honestly

Clear communication is key when it comes to resolving any conflict. Express your thoughts and feelings in a non-confrontational manner and listen actively to the other person’s perspective.

Some ways you can do this is by focusing on your emotions and sharing it in the most simplest form. A common mistake in communication during conflict, is that there can be very long explanations, making it very challenging for the person who is receiving this information to truly understand.

Set yourself up for success by slowing down, sharing shorter messages, and using “I-statements.”

Seek help from a neutral third party

If the conflict is between family members or close friends, consider involving a neutral third party, such as a wedding planner, officiant, or even therapist, to mediate the situation.

Sometimes having someone outside of the conflict help out can give everyone involved an opportunity to communicate their side and can help refocus the conversation on to what is most important. Many times during conflict, other past arguments or resentments can come up, which can be confusing and challenging to handle. 

Set boundaries

It’s important to establish boundaries and stick to them. Decide what is and isn’t acceptable behavior and communicate this to those involved in the conflict. It is even okay to share that you would like to communicate about a specific topic at another time, especially if conflict arises while you are touring a venue, at a celebratory event, or may just be emotionally and mentally exhausted. 

Setting boundaries can also be helpful in minimizing your chances of experiencing wedding planning burnout. 

Prioritize what’s important

Remember that at the end of the day, the most important thing is that you and your partner are happy and in love. Try to prioritize what’s truly important to you and let go of the smaller details that are causing stress and drama.

A helpful tip is to try to remember what your experience was like at the last wedding you attended. What helped in having a good time? Chances are, this is what is most important for you on your wedding day and it’s okay to let go of other details. If you find it challenging to completely not plan for the smaller details, how can you delegate this to someone else you trust who can help.

Seek professional help

If the conflict is causing significant stress and impacting your mental health, consider seeking professional help from a licensed therapist or counselor. This is especially important if you are experiencing conflict arise between you and your partner. It can be a scary feeling when the wedding planning stress and conflict becomes the priority over the relationship. Remember that your wedding day is for a few hours and your marriage is what will continue long after the big day. 

If you want to find ways to invest in your relationship, be sure to take advantage of some online premarital courses or seek out some online premarital counseling from licensed mental health professionals. You can do this by contacting therapists at Modern Wellness Counseling, or give them a call 210-706-0392 to schedule your next appointment. 

By following these tips, you can hopefully diffuse any wedding planning drama and keep the focus on what truly matters: your love and commitment to each other.

 If  you are interested in additional resources, be sure to check these out:

• Free Conversation Checklist 
• A guide that will help you strengthen your relationship for only $17 
• Videos and additional worksheets packages 

By Priscilla Rodriguez, M.S., LMFT, Owner of Modern Wellness Counseling

Priscilla specializes in working with engaged couples and helps them learn the strategic tools needed so that they can be on the same page throughout every chapter of their lives.